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Caretaker Stories: Feeling Guilty

I’ve been composing this post in my head since I read about the Utah State University study on the relationship between caretakers and Alzheimer’s patients. I was one of the primary caretakers for my grandmother — who among other health issues has Alzheimer’s disease — for the better part of three years. It’s hard, frustrating, stressful, exhausting work, and eventually I had to stop. I packed up and moved across the country to have a fresh start in a new place, surrounded by friends. And left my mother doing the majority of my grandmother’s care. When I was still there, … Continue reading →

Watching Alzheimer’s Progress From Afar

Back when I lived in New Jersey, I was one of the main caretakers for my grandmother. I lived with her, so it was usually easy enough for me to handle insulin injections for her diabetes, daily meds (for various health conditions, including Alzheimer’s disease), grooming, and light cleaning. In May 2007, I moved out. I was feeling too stressed and frustrated with the caretaking duties, and starting to have disturbing dreams about hurting her deliberately. That was when I said enough was enough. I didn’t want there to even be a chance of those dreams becoming reality. It’s been … Continue reading →